Good Guy, I concur with Pup on everything, of course telling randoms is not a helpful thing, just close friends and family is all that is necessary...

and I absolutely think you are right about setting boundaries re the OM, no matter who she claims him to be and in what capacity, um, i have never had a "friend" who would want to impinge on my marriage or come into my family home... some friend eh? nah

I dont know about making statements like "everything you say is a lie", thats a little brutal (even tho true), id more use logic like above with her as in, how much of a friend can he BE to cause so much trouble, and odnt tell me he doesnt know bc YOU as his FRIEND must be telling him so he KNOWS how I feel right? um lets rethink the word "friend". I wouldnt want to come anywhere NEAR a friend of mines maritial problems thanks... this is why I find it hard to BELIEVE you.

xoxoxo stay strong but do it calmly and logically and not accusingly or hatefully, and those little steps and statements will sink into her one way or another.

When you're down to nothing, God is up to something.