New around here...

[hopeful_cb]

Thanks guys for all your comments, I'll reply to them after a little thought.

As for updating, H talked to me last night and it was a complete nightmare.

At first he was just asking about how I was, telling me what he'd been up to. I tried to keep it light and joking. Then he asked me for money, telling me about him not having enough and that I am not even paying for half of things. So there was a discussion about that. After it all I said I'd get back to him on it, (as I wasn't about to promise anything and didn't want to argue about it).

He also mentioned about possibly looking for new jobs, said his company might go under, mentioned a few places he may look at if that did happen.

Then OW subject came up. A lot of things were said. Basically the main things he said were that

'I am just living my life at the moment. not stressing about what I am doing just being me.'

'I am not doing things for you or to spite you'

'I really dont have a need to clear things with you or to run things past you, I am not doing anything that disrespects you, nothing that I feel is wrong'

He went on to say 'I do spend time with her. but I don't spend all of my time with her. I have no reason to lie to you'

When I asked if they were having a relationship? he said 'starting to I guess. but all the things that I talked about apply, I need to be happy in myself, I enjoy living here and having my time'

I ended up saying something like 'It is very disrespectful to me to be carrying on a relationship with another woman while still married to me' I can't quite remember all the rest of it, there was so much going on.

I am still trying to process it all I guess. Trying to figure out what to do now. It does feel like the last blow really.