You sound good. And your outlook is good too. Single parent "sucks" - bet you mean hard work. But the kids are worth it. I bet they are starting their Christmas lists - mine are.
Yes, the single parent thing is overwhelming at times, but one good thing... our kids can't divorce us and if we're there for them they will most likely always be there for us.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
Running, thanks for stopping by. The cool thing about this journey is that I am a lot closer to my kids. It is sad that there littel worlds get turned upside down but in the end, we will actually be much closer....ironic, huh?
Echo, I actually heard from Chicago just yesterday. I still don;t have the details - he just checked in to state that he's still around and will get me an update soon. I can't wait to hear the update! Ao are you and W still living in the dark?
I have mediation this Saturday - bet that'll be fun!
hey cherish.....what happened w/ mediation?...new thread?...if you see this could you review my sitch and offer advice?..mediation tomorrow(maybe!..postponed a few times already)...thanks....BIG TUNA
ME-47 WAW-42 S16 S8 bomb 5/5/06 separated 10/6/06 D 4/18/07
Sorry I haven't gotten back to you yet - I was traveling most of the day, today.
I haven't read your thread yet so I will only offer the following advice at this time:
Mediation is a means by which an ungly court divorce can be avoided. If kept civil and amicable, not only will you save yourselves a lot of $$ but you may get to remain friends in teh long run.
I think the opportunities that are presented by mediation are largely affected by the mediator. I know very little about court ordered mediation although I have heard rumor that some may require court ordered marriage counseling. That said, my mediator is one that believes in resolving things in a win-win manner. While this will likely not stay the execution of my marriage, it will hopefully bring some understanding and peace between W and I.
For you, I can only offer that you will only get out of mediation what you put into it. If you go in without a desire to cooperate and find a win-win solution, then mediation will likely be a waste of time.
I'm sorry I can't offer more right now - especially without knowledge of your sitch . Like I said before, if you have specific questions or would like to talk, contact me at cherrishher at yahoo.com (note the mispelling of "cherish"...W pointed it out to me and I can't help but leave it misspelled to get her goat
Good luck tomorrow - Tuna, it's not the end my man, just a new chapter!!
Cherrishher asked if I might post for him as he has no time or access right now and needs some feedback. He is very stressed and ready to just say F it to the courts.
Quick update; He is D from W that brought him to these boards. He is also remarried, but with stresses still being caused by XW. He was laid off and accepted a job out of state, and then lost that one. Moved back and lived with family until he accepted a job out of state again. This job is just over half of what he use to make and here is a large problem. His support and spouse maintanance is so high he can't live. He went back to court to have it restructured and the judge said it was to much to deal with and put it to trial in November. WTH His XW is pressuring through atty for payments which he doesn't have. She also withholds his children from him for money. With what he pays to her she can live comfortably without working and even have a live in BF she supports. Like I said he is at his wits end. He can't take care of his kids if he loses his job or ends up in jail because of an assinine system.
Any questions I'll be happy to answer if I can.
Please if anyone has any ideas that might, could, may help him out or find a direction to get relief with the courts please post.
This is happening in California and I have only heard horror stories like this from there.
Thanks all!
For Cherrishher from cire
Fly little bird fly
Me 48 X's vary S 27 S 18 Back with high school sweety after 30 years..
Yeah, California is f'cked up. My BIL was put in a similar situation. He got tired of fighting and now is basically a pauper and hasn't seen his kids for about 6 years.
But he also had a bad lawyer. What amazes me is that a lawyer can take his XW's side and have no qualms about putting him in the poorhouse.