D1 was having a fun time this morning. She wanted me to hold her this morning and did the whole putting her head on my shoulder and saying "Da Da" and smiling at the daycare worker while leaning against me. W's coworkers are all lightening up to me... the situation isn't as cut and dried as she made them think - and virtually all of them should be aware of her A by now, assuming gossip travels as I believe it does.
I was very angry yesterday at W... I understand I should be angry at her behaviors, illness, and the A itself - but I find it harder and harder to have compassion for her. I am no longer reaching out to her, I've let her know already, on multiple occasions, how I've felt and she has made no move back towards the M.
Meanwhile I'm not sure what I'd say if she did. We are < 2 months from the trial, I'm not even sure if she is cooperating with her attorney at this point, and we'll know in < 2 weeks whether she shows up for her deposition. I'm pretty sure she is in denial at the moment, and the only change is going to come when she hits rock bottom - as she is well on her way to doing.
I can't have a relationship with her if she is refusing to face the reality of the situation. My list of priorities hasn't changed...
1. D1/Custody/D 2. W getting help 3. My M
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
