I think the best thing I can do right now is to go almost totally dark. I'm going to stop contacting him for anything other than the kids. It's going to be hard since we see each other on my day off every week and spend a good amount of time together. I need to do this though. I need to put some distance between us for my own sanity above everything else. I think I've been too accommodating so far. I buy him lunch when he's with me since he has no job and no money. I buy him cigarettes for the same reason. I've been trying to treat him like a friend and do all of the things i would do for a friend who's down on their luck, but I don't think that this situation calls for that anymore. I think he needs to really be on his own if that's what he wants. I will still be positive and friendly when I take the kids to his house and when we're doing things as a family (which still might happen considering it's the summer and we tend to do a lot of activities that the kids may want him to be a part of). I don't know how effective it'll be for DBing, but it'll go a long way for my emotional state.
