Just when I thought that I was doing ok with it all and that I was going to survive this . . . it's like a big slap of reality and I'm right back to where I was emotionally. It feels like this pain is never going to end. It's like I'm just always going to think I'm ok and then wham! I'm a crying mess again. I just want it to stop. I am so tired of this battle that only I'm fighting. I'm so tired of being the punching bag while he does what he wants and calls all of the shots. I feel so defeated and broken . . .
