Divorce looming #13

[K4D]

Sure. Let me know when works for you.

Kevin

[K4D]

I don't see that book Joy on the barnes and noble website.

Last night and this morning was hard not having my kids with me. I didn't sleep much last night. I kept waking up thinking about my future.

This morning D7 called me to say hi for a minute. It was nice to hear from her.

One thing I need to make sure I don't do is go into a shell during the weeks I don't have the kids. I have to force myself to get out and be with other people.

I didn't realize I would be terrifying to be with. I wish I had insurance for C and meds. I lost that number to the free C here.

I might go to an AA meeting tomorrow. Tonite D11 has her talent show.

Kevin

[aliveandkicking]

AA sounds good.

http://www.amazon.com/Joy-Happiness-Within-Insights-Living/dp/0312320744

[K4D]

Aliveandkickin, there were times I wanted to die also. But I no longer feel that way. One night in florida I did call the suicide hotline because I was so depressed.

A lot of times I wonder if I am just plain not attractive anymore. I know I look older than I am. I don't exactly ever get hit on or flirted with or even so much as a smile from women.

I think alone time is great when you have chosen it, not necessarily been forced into it.

But none the less, I have to find a way to enjoy it.

Kevin

[K4D]

Looks like I am taking my kids to dinner before the talent show.
That works for me.

Kevin

[K4D]

How is everyones afternoon going?

Kevin

[MrBond]

Kevin,

It's one thing to say you're looking into getting C and another just to do it. Did you look into any C through the church? And what I mean by C is not a one-time casual conversation. You need someone to talk to you long-term and check up on your progress.

Like, right now, aren't you supposed to be concentrating on your job (that you don't like) rather than posting?

[25yearsmlc]

"wonder if I'm plain not attractive anymore"....well did a woman hit on you this week or not? (no, not the prostitute...) but guess you forgot that. And then some guy I can only ASSUME YOU ASKED, gave you "tips" on what you need to improve in your looks and as I said, I assume he's an image consultant so it's his job to find your flaws and tweak you into looking your best. If he was some guy who said all this crap to you UNinvited, then you sure take a lot of crap from strangers.
I live in an area WITH image consultants and they do play a valuable role. But instead of taking their advice and using it positively, you are sliding down your negative spiral again.

If there was some validity to the "image consultant's" words, take his advice and work on your looks and FEEL BETTER about yourself. If it's all BS, then ignore it!

None of us has seen you in person. But if you start being a SVON again, trust me when I say --that IS SOOO UNATTRACTIVE....lose the negativity. Now.

j-

[K4D]

I found the number to that counseling service again and called and left another voice mail.

I just have a lot of scars and lines I would like to get rid of. I didn't take as good of care of my skin as I should have in past years.

I had subway for dinner with my girls. That was enjoyable. Now I am waiting for the talent show to start.

I am posting from my blackberry.

Kevin

[The Wifey]

wow, for just a minute I thought you were going to go 24 hours without posting about her...but NOPE.


So she really is irrelevant. So don't talk about her anymore. Period. Be the best man you can be. Period. I don't want to say this anymore. It's enabling.

J-

J- Hey bud. I know you are trying to help motivate Kevin, but not everyone "gets it" on the same timetable. Positive motivation works better than an unpadded 2x4. I agree that Kevin needs to get to the point of doing things and not wondering about what the W is up to. But not everyone can just turn it off.

Its all about tone sometimes. There's been many times I've had to turn away and not post for a while. When someone is hurting, they sometimes hurt so bad that they need support, not whacks.