Sorry to hear that you fell off the DB wagon. Well I'm here to pick you back up.
Just keep staying dark and just journal your frustrations here. It seems like you let him control you again and gave up the power in the R back to him. Well now's your chance to take it back. Just stay dark as hard as it is for you and stand strong. You can do it.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.