Quote: Also, DON'T ask him when he's coming to visit S again. He is obviously seeing that as your attempt to control his movement. Let visiting his S be HIS idea...it should be anyway.
When it was suggested that I set up a visitation schedule in my gut it felt too final, like we were D'd. (LL--maybe this worked with your H, but T2 is right, my H hates to have his time controlled or commit to any return time when he did leave to do something even when we were together) Until he went on his two week vacation, he was seeing son at least two times a week and generally one day a weekend. If I had plans to do things during the week he would see son then. I do feel better about this now.
I always thank him for coming over, but he doesn't seem to like that I say that either. He says "he's my son why wouldn't I want to see him." Well there are a lot of fathers out there that don't see their kids on a regular basis if at all so this is why I say it. I haven't said this last sentence either and I'm not sure I should BECAUSE he does have another S19 who he's fighting with right now. S19 is such a good kid, but he's not afraid to stand up to his dad anymore thus they haven't seen each other in awhile. I know it bugs H, but he acts like it doesn't and says mean things about his S19.
Thanks for the advice T2, I will keep my thoughts here. Deep down H might realize this, also, but not like that I am doing fine without him.
