I DID want her to make some EFFORT, however, at working at healing the marriage, but I guess that's too much to ask. She went to a sum total of TWO MC sessions with me, and didn't even do the exercise she was supposed to do (which was pay me a couple of genuine COMPLIMENTS over the three-week period in-between MC sessions. She couldn't do it ONCE). And this was after we basically PUNTED having her work on my primary LL, which is "physical touch," because that's too hard for her.
Hey, I've hardly ever defended Mrs. P, enough others here that do that. I think you're right: she's self-centered, has sex issues, and other stuff. You know that. She now says she's going to see an IC and work on them. I think you need to give her time to do that; she's not going to instantly or maybe even quickly transform as fast as you seem to be wanting. If she doesn't go to the IC and work on those issues, you can reevaluate. But seems like you're judging her too quickly. And let the IC deal with all that stuff. Not your problem. Sorry for the repeat on that... I know you have the insight into her and I think you could probably psychoanalyze her better than any C, but you're her H, not her C, right? Karen
I think you're right: she's self-centered, has sex issues, and other stuff. You know that. She now says she's going to see an IC and work on them. I think you need to give her time to do that; she's not going to instantly or maybe even quickly transform as fast as you seem to be wanting. If she doesn't go to the IC and work on those issues, you can reevaluate. But seems like you're judging her too quickly. And let the IC deal with all that stuff. Not your problem. Sorry for the repeat on that... I know you have the insight into her and I think you could probably psychoanalyze her better than any C, but you're her H, not her C, right? Karen