I hear you antlers. I didn't sweat any stuff which was wrong and then started sweating everything once I tried to change which was also wrong. Now I'm finding a pretty good balance I guess. The good thing is that no matter what happens with W and me...I'm better in the long run for all of this. I know more now about how to have a healthy relationship than I ever did and I have to thank W for that. If she hadn't dropped the bomb on me I don't know if I ever would have known what I was doing and had the knowledge and incentive to work on it. Even though W has hurt me more than I think anyone ever has before....I am a better man now because of it.
