I bought Fireproof and still can't bring myself to watch it. Everyone I know that has seen it says it is powerful and wonderful. I'm going to have to build my courage and just watch for heavens sake!
BBJ, go with whatever your gut tells you. Like you said, there is no rush to file. Nothing is going to change drastically anyway once you do. It's just paper.
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
I haven't watched it either. I know what it is about and I am sure I would relate to it, but my H just doesn't seem to want to have that epiphany...
I don't really know how to explain myself other than that I just hope he talks to the Pastor so the Pastor can help him, more so even than help us. Because he is adrift and hates his life and told me last night that he thinks if we divorce his life will be much much worse than it is now. Doesn't bode well since he already hates his life....I guess I am hoping the Pastor can find a way to reach him. Because my kids need a Daddy who has peace in his life, and Dan has none whatsoever.
I actually feel great today. My mom called this morning crying (on her birthday! she is very much the martyr type. She knew we were meeting last night to go over the details of a D, I didn't tell her what happened once we met...
So she called to ask if she could text Dan. I said absolutely NOT, what could you possibly want to say to him. She said, I want to tell him to be careful with my daughter's heart, or something like that... I said no way, he will just figure I put you up to it. I told her I sure hoped she hadn't already sent it...she said no but you never know with her. Aargh.
Anyway she is feeling worse about it than I am. I have peace today, regardless of the outcome. Actually I feel a little bit like when K said her H woke up a sleeping giant, or whatever. I am wanting a newer better relationship and talking to Dan last night I honestly don't know if he will be capable of that. It would sure take a lot of change in his attitudes and would require him to have that peace he doesn't have.
So I am feeling this weird confidence and energy to get moving forward on my life, my goals, my plans. I have said that before but it feels different now. Went and picked out a new ceiling fan today, bought a bunch of new clothes yesterday for summer, ready for some changes and some fun.
I understand your feeling about not wanting your mom to send a message to Dan. However, give your mom some credit, she cares about you and she was not born yesterday. She does have a bit more life experience than you and may look at things differently. If you watch the Fireproof movie, you will see that Caleb (the main character) has similar feelings about his mother getting involved.
If you do watch Fireproof, I would recommend you watch it by yourself and with lots of tissues handy. Ideally, it would be the best thing he could see now besides getting life advice from the Pastor. I think Dan might relate quite a bit to the Caleb character.
Mishka is correct - it is a very powerful and emotional movie for those of us who have experienced marriage problems.
"So she called to ask if she could text Dan. I said absolutely NOT, what could you possibly want to say to him. She said, I want to tell him to be careful with my daughter's heart, or something like that... I said no way, he will just figure I put you up to it. I told her I sure hoped she hadn't already sent it...she said no but you never know with her. Aargh." BBJ, I doubt any convo between your mom and Dan can go smoothly because your Mom will most likely speak angrily to him. My guess is it's best to leave it to the pastor to try to reach Dan. In fireproof Caleb's parents never spoke directly to the W. And interestingly when his parents were heading towards breakup it was the dad who wanted it not the mom.
The downloaded copy doesnt work on my Dvd sets...