Another newcomer - already finding help

[JKL2009]

Another night on the WAW roller coaster. W came home, little late, said she had a meeting run late. Seemed in a bad mood, but I didn't engage or initiate. After a while, she said something about hating coming home so late and seemed to settle down.

After putting S to bed, she went to watch TV and I stayed upstairs reading and went to bed. Low and behold, she came to bed again. This is day 3 or 4 now, after a month not sharing a bed. She also said before she didn't want to sleep in the same bed because I would use it against her in separation proceedings (can't be separated and sleep in same bed).

Still not sure what to think, but not really trying. Haven't said a word to her about her sleeping choice these past days and don't plan to. Funny too... she has been having trouble sleeping most nights the past few months (me too) but the past few nights have been solid full nights of sleep. Wonder what that means?

Anyway, I am just keeping a little space and a little aloofness. Hope I can keep it real all long weekend.

[JKL2009]

I just got the weirdest email from WAW and not sure how to respond. Hope someone can give advice?

I was exhausted last night so couldn't really talk. Yesterday was just one of those days. Some days things hit me hard and I have a difficult time some days I think everything will be ok. Yesterday I was a mess for no typical reason. The lack of sleep, FIL's visit and of course the obvious has been building up.

So with that said I really need to go out tonight for awhile and not think about everything and have fun. So I hope you can let me do that and not get all mad at me when I come home tonight or give me the silent treatment tomorrow morning. It's crazy that I have to ask this of you when you have been going out for years doing who knows what. I should just say I can do whatever I want w/o worrying about your feelings, but I can't do that...

[JKL2009]

I think I should just respond saying thanks for writing, I understand your feelings. I hope you have fun tonight and no worries - S and I will have a fun night and I look forward to the weekend.

Thoughts?

[volleydog]

Looks good to me...Not sure about the thanks for writing part but I like the rest.

[JKL2009]

Thanks! Coach, PDT... any thoughts?

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Thanks! Coach, PDT... any thoughts?

Yes. Nix the last part, and just say "OK, I understand. Thanks for letting me know."

You really don't want to say "have fun tonite" if you're not sure about what she's doing/who she's seeing now, do you???

[JKL2009]

Thanks for the advice all, appreciate it. I am not trying to analyze the email itself, but based on it and her behavior, it seems like maybe my DB stuff might be working a bit. Just got to keep it up.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Good. Remember, you want to convey that you LOVE her, but it's not like you're sitting around PINING for her, either. Be busy, look good, smell good, and mysterious. And not too available!

[JKL2009]

I hope I got the smell good part done OK! I think it will interesting to see if she texts me tonight while out - she used to do that a bit. I also know she has kept some texts from me for the past couple of months that were fun/inside joke/flirty messages. I sure won't text her tonight though!

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Don't. Answer them much later, with a "Sorry, I was busy and didn't see these until just now. See you soon" (or whatever)