You don't need to confront him to heal. You don't need him in front of your face to do it either. You forgive in your heart, doesn't have to be in person.
I see the man I married, the one I loved, the father of my children as dead. This person I see way too much for my liking is but an alien in my H's body. This creature has done way too much damage to my life and my kid's lives to consider taking him back. Done, over, finito.
You keep feeding your anxiety. Let it go. I occasionally have visions of situations myself and no not the daydreamy ones. I can't tell you how to deal with those except to work them out. You say you don't want him back...fine. Let it go. The person that you loved is gone and for all practical purposes doesn't exist anymore.
You have to do this for you and your family. Drop the rope that leads to him.
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
