Hey Jimbo, sorry to get serious on you here with all this joking around and all, but I am just getting caught up.
This whole thing that we are doing here, it is cyclical. You will go though several periods of self awareness and evaluation. Several bouts of self doubt. Several bouts of anger. Several bouts of upswings where you actually feel ok.
It is ok and normal to have feelings of less than stellar self esteem. It is normal to wonder what is wrong with YOU. It is good to step away and evaluate and formulate plans for moving forward.
The important thing is that you accept these cycles, learn to make them productive, and continue moving forward.
The bottom line my friend is that someone that we trusted with everything we had not only pushed us aside, but also took the time to sling a bag of rocks at our balls while we were lying there helpless.
There are not a lot of men who can take that abuse and come through without emotional damage. This is painful and odds are the worst thing you have been through in your life. The secret is to embrace what has occurred, recognize that because of the pain that you have endured and the hell that you are going through, you are going to be a stronger person with incredible understanding and compassion when the insanity ends.
I have said this over and over again and I am going to reiterate it to you in particular. Our spouses DO NOT define the person that we are. Our spouses DO NOT define the character and moral fortitude that we possess. Our spouses DO NOT control our future and what type of life we choose to lead. You DO control your own destiny. You do get to define your own morals and character. You DO get to look back later and be proud of yourself because YOU stood your ground and YOU did the work to change.
Self confidence, self esteem, and self preservation are 3 things that we get to be in control of. Generally speaking we struggle with these issues not because of things that we have done or said, but because of things that others who we have allowed to have some control in our lives have said or done.
Standing up is as simple as putting both feet on the ground and pushing upward...plain and simple dude.
