Hi I'm writing in for my sister who's husband of less than 2 months is leaving her and his step-children. I told her not to give him this letter. Please make comments I can email her.
Dear ___,
I’m writing this letter to you to just express to you my feelings about what is going on here. When we met and fell in love, we both had such a strong connection to each other and it turned into a very strong and deep love. My experience of love has always been one that doesn’t just end when you go through rough times. We had that strong and deep love…and still do, I believe, but with you when times get rough, you are able to just let the love go…along w/ the desire to work through it. We have had some difficult times…and although they were difficult, they did allow us to grow and get to a place where all of our main obstacles are gone. I understand that you feel you cannot get back to the place where you need to be…but as Shay had mentioned last night, there are times in a relationship when you don’t feel like you want it anymore, but when you make a commitment like you did to me and the boys, you stick w/ it and then when things get better, which they would have, you can have even more and better than you ever had…even at the beginning…because you have worked through everything and have a deeper connection than even before. I know you don’t want to give us that opportunity to do that. And I’m accepting of that. I will never understand how you can just let go of something you did feel so strongly about even just less than 2 months ago when we were getting married and on our honeymoon, buying the rules for a good marriage and sitting and talking about how we were going to remind ourselves to stay “in the zone”. I guess your history has proved that you are able to just leave relationships and I should have known better than to think this would be different. But I did. One of my biggest hurts is because of the boys thinking you were going to be their stepdad and giving their hearts to you…and I will be filled w/ agony when their hearts break and cry knowing you have will no longer be in their lives….
As far as money, you just asked me why you should pay for me and Brian’s kids to go to camp. I’m sure you realize that it’s not you paying for them to go. It’s you keeping your word when you have not contributed any income at all to all of our living expenses, bills, etc for over a month…and knowing that I’ve had to use the money I got for my ring as well as every penny I’ve had for our bills, living expenses w/ the plan that your pay from your sales would be there for camp. In addition, I’ve had to use all the money in my kids’ accounts since meeting you so now they have nothing in their savings…and think they do. Please don’t make this a problem and leave me and the boys without at least helping us financially when I’ve used all my income on keeping us afloat. I believe you have the decency to not just abandon us without living up to your agreement of using your pay at least for camp and helping out with bills. I never would’ve signed up for this house with all the addt’l expenses if I didn’t believe you were going to be with us. And I can’t afford it all myself. I am planning on looking to move but for now, any help you give would be very appreciated. I’m not the type to get ugly b/c that’s not who I am…but I’m hoping you will do the right thing here and not leave us high and dry. As it is, it will be difficult enough for us all to accept that you’re able to just move on like this..please don’t make it any more difficult by not helping us financially as well…
I'm going with no. I don't see the point. The guy sounds like a leach and an a**hole. She should find out if she has any legal rights (doubt it in so short a marriage). Otherwise, the letter is just "you're a jerk. you're letting us down. you suck. please give me some money."
But, if she wants to get it off her chest, go for it, not much to lose.
Sounds like she's begging him and giving him all the power in the R. If she can make do on her own, then she should do so. If not, then she should get legal counsel to get what she's owed from this guy.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
My opinion is also no. I would outline his financial obligations as far as any debts go and other than that be done with it. Anything more is pursuing and giving him all the power with none of the pay off.
M:39 H:39 K:S14;D8 T:22yr M:15yrs S:12/28/07 EA/PA 3/14/08 OW preg 11/17/08 born 12/12/08 his ~~~~~~~ Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option
No. Instead she should talk to a lawyer like yesterday.
Me 45, H 46, S 23, M 26, Together 30, Bomb 6-2-08, S 6-19-08; H left 12-29-08. H home 12-09, Still MLC in 2012! Me- I have my big girl panties on. Bring it.
