You're not a fool, it's just that we all change over time and forgot to nurture the things that should not have been neglected.
Hindsight is always 20/20. But now armed with the knowledge ammo you have, you have the chance to turn that boat around.
At first it will be like turning the course of the Titanic, but it can be done. Don't ever lose sight of that. First rule of DB is to stop blaming yourself. What's past is past and you can't change it. You also can't change your W. You can only change yourself in the here and now.
What kind of things first attracted your W to you in the first place? See if that can be re-created. Most importantly, grow yourself and just take things one day at a time.
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
