I'm a FWAW who also had an affair. I'm new to the board. Puppy is having some great things to say........
Do nothing financial to enable her affair. Right now it sounds to me as if she views you as a provider only- and is really only wanting to keep the status quo because you pay her bills and she can work part time.
I'd also ask her if she understands she'll have to take a full time job to support herself- because you will not enable her moving out in any way. That means, no deposit for an apartment- no furniture, nada. She wants to be on her own? She'll have to do it herself.
I'm not completely familiar with DB I must say- I'm just chiming in as someone who has been there from your wifes perception.
