XH and I were together more than 30 years, divorced two months shy of our 30th anniversary.
I certainly did some of the wrong stuff before the divorce was filed, but thankfully not after the filing. Something finally clicked in my head by then, and I avoided the worst of what you spoke.
I also want to jump in about the harm to the kids. I couldn't agree with you more. The older they are, the more they remember the intact family, so it becomes harder for them to accept what they had believed all those years was apparently a 'lie'. It's something that my two sons secretly and silently still deal with 3 years after the divorce. And they certainly have missed not having a male role model. They are now 31 and 26...so don't let anyone convince you that when they're older they should be able to handle it like an adult. They still are harmed and suffer, and will for years if not for their lifetime in someway.
I appreciate that you have taken the time to share your experiences..good and bad...with the posters here...especially the ones just starting out on this unwanted journey.
Thank you again.
Women are angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible
