hes still hiding; which might mean hes still with the OW, but... and heres the great part... I am actually in a place where I kind of hope he is. I KNOW that sounds crazy, and people FRESH to this kind of horrible sitch will NEVER believe they might secretly wish that one day.... but the truth is...I cant think of two people who deserve each other more. Not only that, but I wouldnt wish anyone who didnt know of their pasts to be with them... how horrible. In fact, I freely admit, its that horror that still makes me wary of men today. I think about how my ex is gonna have to lie, and realise theres plenty of others doing just that... its a grim and sobering realisation. TRUST is not something I am going to win back anytime soon. I am cynical; I am immediately suspicious of any man who blames his wife, and particularly any man who has no contact with children and blames his wife. I simply.. DONT believe them. I just nod and smile and walk A W A Y... I'd rather be alone, than get a man who'd do that. Of course, the painful thing that one realises, in the end, is that they're probably going to learn tough lessons, and be a better person, and a far nicer husband, than they ever were to YOU. That stings. On the other hand... cant imagine a lot of truth is going to be told there, so no matter how nice he might be to anyone new he ends up with, shes STILL never going to know just what he did. **shudders** I know I wouldnt choose to be with someone who did stuff like that. THEREFORE, I am probably single for life!
When you're down to nothing, God is up to something.
