To love unconditionally and to bring out the best in my Wife. That's my responsibility and that's what I would do for her or any other special person in my life. As for my needs - good question. There are more things I'm realizing I need and more that I realize I want. Whether or not she can be that person I do not yet know.
You bring up several good points. Besides knowing my W much better now, I also know myself a lot better. I now know what kind of a R/M I want and I honestly believe that my W could be that person. Heck, she was that person up until she started her own business and became a workaholic, then it went downhill from there. I felt neglected, resentment, ignored, all the stuff I think you've been through also. Now, I know why I felt that way. Part of it was my fault, and part of it was hers. I improved myself to the person I want to be. I used to not have very many friends and relied on my W for social interactions, that was my problem. Now, I have friends and I am happy with that. I still miss being in a R/M however. But I know that once I get back into one that fits me as I am now, everything will fall into place.
I guess I am rambling on about my state of mind, but I think you're going down the same road and maybe it helps to make stuff fall into place?
The other thing I was trying to say is that obviously your W will need to work on herself also. There's nothing you can do to accelerate that process, you just have to give it time and get yourself ready to get into the best R of your life (whether it be with your W or someone else).
That your W can't sleep sounds very familiar! Same thing happened with my W. They're processing stuff and keep the brain going...
