Yep, not feeling like a priority is something that as I go back and see, I realize is a problem. A big problem. I realize she is busy with school. The same school I encouraged her to go to and that I have committed to support her with.
"These colors never run" echoes in my head. However, I am slowly starting to see that I may not want her back in my life as anything more than the former Mrs. I'm wrestling with the idea that I love her but may not want to have her back in my life as a trusted part of it.
My W thought about giving up on opening her shop several times. Sometimes because of the responsabilities that go with it that I reminded her of. She took those as wanting to dissuade her from doing it, but she was looking at things through such intensely rose colored glasses, I felt compelled to point out some of the less attractive things to her also. But at the same time, I have also encouraged her to keep going and told her multiple times that I will help her with it (and I have).
Where our sitchs are different is that I can see how our R could work great. I think I have changed a lot and I think she has noticed. However, she's not entirely happy with her own self yet, but has made changes too, changes that brought back parts of the "old W" again. So, I feel that if she continues to grow herself in the way she has over the past couple of months, I see the possibility of a very good R/M. If anything, I feel like I understand her soo much better now than before all of this. I hope it's mutual. What kind of thoughts does the above bring up in you? Where do you think you are in this regard?
