WAW - Very confused and devastated - pt 9

[confusedinpa]

I think the convo went great. You are doing and saying everything right. I think the "seed of doubt" has been planted and is starting to sprout a little bit. Just keep on VALIDATING. You don't want her to come back out of GUILT. It will only lead to more RESENTMENT by her. When your boys are laying on guilt for mommy to come home I would intervene and defend her by saying mommy just needs time right now and change the subject. You want her to know your on her side again. Like you said, it's ALL about rebuilding that TRUST and RESPECT. I would go DIM again. No return calls till tonight or wait to see her at the game. You are busy GALing and Working remember ;-) Keep the mystery building. Keep the chase on for her.

PMA

That's an excellent point on having her feel guilty to come back. I don't want her to feel resentful about coming back. I told her yesterday that I would want her to come back only when she feels like she wants to/is ready to.

I don't know if its seeds of doubt or she is just feeling sad as the boys are sad or the reality is just starting to hit her as she is no longer able to keep busy with unpacking/setting up her apartment. Whatever it is, she is in a very tough place emotionally. I do feel for her.

She did try to call me twice today (within a span of 30 minutes). I couldn't/didn't answer it as I was in the middle of a meeting. I was tempted to call her back but she didn't leave a message. It would have been around the time of when could be calling to go out to lunch. Don't know. I am so tempted to call her back now, but figured I would just wait.

I do have an appointment to talk to my lawyer to figure out what to do about child support so I got that this afternoon. This child support thing couldn't come at a worse time. Everytime I think we may be reconnecting, something divorce related comes up that reminds her that she wants to leave/divorce. Very frustrating....

I will wind up calling her in the afternoon as last nite she asked me to call her to let her know what was going on for dinner before my 3 year old's baseball.

So confusing.....