I am left devastated because he has left

[mishka422]

Talking about ow while your WAS is deep in their A with them only serves to validate their R. Inevitably any talk about ow will be heated and become very contentious. When you become upset the WAS will not only defend the ow but will also feel like they were absolutely right about you. "She's crazy. Look at her, she's desperate, clingy and needy. ow is such a wonderful person and would never yell and become upset with me like this. My W doesn't deserve me at all." Just some of the crazy rambling of their brains. My xh actually said all of those things out loud to me while I was railing at him about ow. It serves to solidify their position regarding their A.

Also, talking about ow gives her headspace that she doesn't deserve. This sitch is not about ow, it is about your H and his choices. You have choices too.....make the best ones for yourself regardless of what your H might think of them.