Puppy, I get it. The one thing you needed most from your W you couldn't get and then she shares it with someone else. I can taste that rejection. Then you want a little validation and affirmation for all the work you have and are doing. Plus you feel slighted from her not putting in the effort to re-build the M and solidify the love.
All the women here are telling you to read between the lines and open your mind. That's tough to do when you are hurt and angry. You have every right to feel the way you do. I would let all those feelings out someplace safe, it is a lot to keep bottled up.
When my W and I were seperated I used to wake up in the middle of the night sobbing violently. Then one night I felt a firm hand on my chest up by my throat and a loud, calm voice say over and over, "Enough, Enough, Enough...." until I stopped. I knew it was God telling me to let go of all my anger, bitterness and fears. I work and pray every day to kill those "snakes on a brain." The negative emotions were holding me back, the old hurts and injustices didn't have relevance to who I am trying to be. It was hurting me, my marriage, my family and career.
Validate yourself, look at all the good you do here. No expectations, you aren't entitled to anything. ;\) Be your best for your sake. You can handle it.
Strength and Honor
Coach

M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12
Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.