imlost, I dont play games. I thought about your suggestion. I think we are heading to the divorce and I dont want him to ever think that I have a boyfriend and that's why this didnt work out.
I'm sorry, Kalni. I didn't mean that you should play games. And I didn't mean that your husband should think you have a boyfriend.
What I meant was more trying what I did, which worked for me, which was exactly this: I don't know if they have an equivalent in Greece, but I went on an online dating site a few months ago and started going out with men completely platonically--that's key. Nothing else I had done prior to that made me feel so much better, because I am the kind of woman that really loves being around men, I guess because I grew up close to my brothers, and it was "safe" to hang out with these men, because I didn't know them, they had no real expectations. They, collectively, made me feel so much better about myself as a woman and my future prospects.
And, my X did notice, not that I flaunted it in front of him, or that it's a game, but rather it was my protection and security in the fact that I was wanted, and helped me face him and show him I was stronger.
I actually agree with Bworl in a lot of ways, but you don't sound like you're completely done...yet. I would support you either way. Although you do sound depressed, and I hope you can find a way to gather strength and confidence again, in whatever way that turns out to be.
I was just suggesting one of lots of different ways to do that, because of seeing how attention from men here had previously seemed to help you find that strength. Not that you didn't do it on your own! I'm just saying it seemed to be a hand to help you. But I could have been totally wrong about that...
It is in the shelter of each other that people live.--Irish proverb
