The only thing you can do is change yourself for the betterment of yourself. After that, there is nothing you can do. All you can do is give him the opportunity to see your changes. You can't force him to notice, but you can give him the chance to see you and your positive changes.
I think you've done that, my dear.
I do think you have to lead, but I'm also adamant that you can't force him to do anything. Sooner or later, he'll have to make an effort.
As long as his identity is tied in w/his work, you'll be in 2nd place. He may come around in time or he may not.
Again, it all depends on how long you are willing to wait for him.
In the meantime, you have to let go of his "inactivity" and live completely for you and your kids. Standing still and waiting won't help.
But how will this be leading? Easy. You'll be living and enjoying life. You'll be showing him what you want out of life and he'll have an opportunity to join you.
Your actions will lead the way. Again, all you can do is give him the chance to follow.
RTL
The question is can you wait until he's ready to act?
