I am left devastated because he has left

[mishka422]

(((Crush)))))

Please, to reiterate what peace said. Make sure you take steps to protect your assets now before he drags you into a huge financial disaster. Do you know if the credit card he is using is a joint account? If so, contact the company immediately and have yourself removed from the account if you can.

I, like the others, am not sure your H is in MLC based on the limited info, but no matter what it is there are steps that you need to take for yourself.

1)Definitely read and read and read DR
2)Don't dwell on the MLC section - read all of it.
3)Make sure you have protected yourself and your kids financially.
4)Do NOT discuss anything about OW with your H. Don't permit him to talk to you about her either. If he brings her up, kindly tell him that she has no place in your life and you would appreciate it if he would not discuss that with you.
5)Limit your discussions with him to kids and finances. In other words - NO R TALK WHATSOEVER
6)Get a DB coach
7)GAL
8)Exercise and eat nutritiously.
9)Understand that what you are feeling is completely normal. If the anxiety is causing you to have panic attacks, please see the Dr. immediately. Xanax is a wonderful thing and better living through chemistry is not always a bad idea....trust me. You can get off the meds with you have processed your situation better.
10)Be kind to yourself. Understand that although your H is the perpetrator of this horrible turn of events, a M involves two people. When the shock wears off a little you will find yourself dwelling on the "What did I do wrong" thoughts. Process them, and let them go. No matter what anyone did 'wrong' in the M, the choices that your H made are his choices and do not reflect on you.
11) JOURNAL. It is very cathartic.

We are all here for you. I'm sorry you have to be here, but this is one of the best places to be if you truly hope to not only save your M, but, in the long run, save yourself.