Struggling with sexual issues

[iwantittowork]

I am posting a question in this forum, as I am having a really difficult time understanding and coming to grips with things my W has said and doing over the coarse of the last few months.

I realize I may never understand it fully, but I continue to have these thoughts creep into my head and they are tough for me to manage.

Since the issues in our relationship have come up, my W has focused on renewed interest in her sexuality and learning about it, however we have not been even close contact in over 5 months. She has been pursuing new books on Tantra and other topics, and I have tried to talk candidly about it without reacting to what she says, but just to understand it.

She says she is open to group relationships now, and relationships with other W as well. I find myself really wondering where she is going in her future, and it stings when I think about, even though these are purely 'what if' scenario's in my own mind.

She's not having a PA that I know of, and believe her, but it's clear she can't wait to finally end our M and start pursuing these newly found interests.

Has anyone faced these kinds of issues? I suspect that the feelings of finding ones S having a PA may be similar, and I am seriously looking for some tools in helping to eliminate the shame and bad feelings that come up when I think about them.

Thanks for any tips, I am struggling mightily with this subject and I know now I need to start getting over them, or I will just make things worse..