To little to late...

[PortlandDad]

MrMom,
There are a lot of people on these boards who will take exception to the notion that it is ever really too late to bust a divorce. Your sitch sounds dire, and most are, but there is hope as long as you want to believe that there is hope. Your W is in the middle of an A-fueled euphoria. Nothing that you can say or do right now is going to have any positive effect. What you say and do can have a negative effect, as you have seen. What you need to do is start following what the books in your possession, and the advice that you are reading here on these boards is telling you to do: detach and work on yourself and your kids right now. GAL! Stop pursuing, crying, begging, doing R talks and the like. You are driving her away with that kind of behavior.

You will hear this a lot: you can't change her, nor can you change her thinking. All you can do is take care of yourself and your kids. As usually are not the panacea that the WAS thinks they are in the beginning. They are "in love" and so they have all the endorphin-crazed feelings, but as they newness of the A wears off, she will discover that the grass really isn't greener over there. Think about it: your W is leaving her primary relationship to be with this OM. This OM knows she is M, right? And still he is pursuing? Sounds like a match made in hell if you ask me. Once they start being themselves with each other, and come down off of their pedestals that they have placed each other on, you will have a chance to effect some change, but only if you start making the improvements in your own character, and life that will be attractive to your W. You may even find that after getting a life and becoming a stellar Mr. Mom to your kids that you, and not her, becomes the WAS.

In the short-term, keep your chin up; exude a positive attitude and stop the pursuit. Be happy when she is around and fawn over your kids. Be the perfect Dad for them, and become the better man for yourself. You can do it! keep posting here for advice and keep updating us with your sitch. Good luck friend.