I should put more thought into this before I even make the suggestion, but do you think it would be a 180 if somehow you could cause her to feel that "she" had to be the one to really do the work this time around in order to keep you? I may have it wrong, but when this happened before, I felt like she "agreed" on trying to piece the M together again, but did she really put any effort into it or was it not mostly you? So, I'm wondering if you were the one that......how shall I say this?........the one she has something to prove to....and that the M is worth saving. Do you think it would make a difference with her? Like when dating and one "plays hard to get"? Does what I'm trying to say make any sence? I'm not sure how you would do it except to not be as "eager" to be the first one to jump into working your a$$ off toward a better R like you did before.... and pull back and just see if she plans to do anything for "you" or if she continues to play the role of the princess. You know, Puppy always used that term when describing his W's attitude in the M and said that she acted as if she "deserved" to be treated like a princess. Where do these women get off being like that? Were they spoiled when they were girls at home?
I'm not suggesting that you not try at all to make things work, but I feel that you were the one that put so much heart, soul, finances, and back breaking labor into doing all that building on the home and every wish she had....you tried to deliver. Where is her stopping place? I'm wondering what she is going to come up with this time to tell you that "if only she had ________, then she would be happy". That doesn't work b/c there will always be something that she thinks will make her happy if she only had that. I have know women like her and you could buy everything she asked for and it would only satisfy her for a short time and then she would be unhappy again. She has to find out what is causing the void inside of her and realize that material things cannot fill that void. That may be another reason she has a need to turn to other men for some type of emotional fulfillment. Like I said before, it seems like something for a professional to fix. However, you can make her go against her will.
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
