Trying to detach from the madness!

[Startingover2]

Maybe I did tell it to myself as well. Its the truth.

I think exh may be trying to change his substance of choice again. Pills are harder to prove as there is no smell or things to hide. When I first met exh he was addicted to Rx pills. Anything he could get his hands on. Some days he would take just a few to get through the work day and nobody would be the wiser and then weekends he would take alot to sleep all day long. He ended up with the same lethargic, stumbling ways he is when drinking. Then he knew he needed to stop the pills so he drank more. Now he may be reverting back.

I just thought of something today. When I was snooping at his email exchange last week with the married woman she mentioned she is always in extreme pain due to many surgeries she has had. Pain most likely means constant pain meds. I am sure exh saw that and felt he hit the lottery. He was always asking unsuspecting people for meds. He told her he was having a bad back problem in a few emails. Strange as the same day he was running here to see baby. You don't run when you have a bad back. So I am sure he is hitting her up for pills. Harder for me to detect pills though.

So today he sent a text saying he wouldn't be down today as he had a backache. I said sorry to hear that..take care. He asked me if I had any pain meds! Me!? The one who gave him crap for so long about the pills before. I told him no.

I picture him like a snake...slithering around trying to catch people off guard.