he is back, i think

[lost-n-Iowa]

I have just read your thread and wanted to offer my support. Hang in there you are doing great!!!

The sleeping on the couch thing is what I have been focusing on in the past posts that you have made. Before everything went down between my H and I, I would sleep on the couch when I was feeling down about something. I would continue to do it when I knew that it bothered my H and he would confront me about it. I would sleep on the couch because I did not want to be near my H after we had a big arguement or that he had treated me with less respect than I beleived that I deserved. I realize that your h has been sleeping there for two weeks now, mine usually lasted a few nights, but there is an underlying reason for it. If you can think back for reasons that may have set this off two weeks ago maybe you can put your finger on it. If he is always moody than you might not be able to.

I would send him an email and ask him politely why he is doing this. Tell him that you want to understand his reasons and that you are not asking him to change what he is doing (this is the hard part), but that you just want to understand.
Earlier someone said that if you don't act like it is bothering you then he may change how is is acting and stop sleeping onthe couch. I agree.

Another thought prehaps....you want him close for intimate contact and he wants to sleep on the couch for whatever reason....Have you thought of having intimate contact on the couch then going to your bed after that? He may see that you are trying to understand what his needs are but that you have needs too. Remember men are physical and woman are emotional. Maybe meeting him on a physical level will open his eyes to your emotional level.

Hope this help a bit.