"I have told her that I am willing to try and continue to change, grow and meet her needs, so long as she's making a reasonable effort to meet mine. It's when she doesn't that I pull away, she knows this, and yet she does it anyway -- EVERY . . . SINGLE . . . TIME."
Right, and what would explain this?
Because she is a narcissist, and lacks empathy, and only gets sufficiently motivated to meet my needs when presented with a strong enough external threat to upset her self-centered equilibrium.
I'm not saying that's necessarily IT, but it's certainly more than plausible, and it's what people that know her (and our sitch) the best seem to think.
