Dear Dawn,
Thanks so much for the post above; yes I found the thread about MLC for Dummies and had a laugh...carbon copy of mu husband.
Thanks for your insight and care.

A few other gems about me that he has said in the last four months:

In a rage; "I never, ever, ever, ever, ever want to be married to you again
I will never, ever, ever. ever be in an intimate relationship with you again
My love for you is dead, if it was just damaged then it could be fixed but once something is dead it can never come back.
I have been treated like a doormat for five years and I am not going to put up with it any longer.
You have subjected me to mental cruelty over the last five years.
You are not the right woman for me to be married to.
I am very sad. I have to now re-establish my life which isn't easy.
Our D will get over this; kids do.
Relationships break up all the time.
(On hearing that I was intending to stand for my marriage but admitting that it would be lonely): now you know what it is and will be like t be unloved and alone.
You say you love me; well, I reject your love, I dont believe it and I dont believe that you can love healthily; what you have is not love but attachment.

AND.........

two days after leaving me: "so what are you going to do for the rest of your life?" and "your grief process is none of my concern".

I think in these sorts of situations people can be friends, I am with XW (his first marriage). But in our situation we cant be friends because you obviously love me and probably always will and I am saying NO!! (pushing me away with his hands).

Yet,in the same period:

You have a beautiful heart and soul.
You are the most desirable woman I could ever imagine being with
If we were having sex it would be the most fantastic sex I could ever imagine.
You are my soul mate; we are connected at a very basic level.
You will always be a part of me.
I think that you are right, love never dies.
I see such a cataclysmic change in you and I now see the woman that I have missed and wanted for the last 5 years. This is the biggest tragedy and sadness of my life.
....................................
Boy oh boy..........any advice/comments?