I have to agree with beginnersmind. They all want their cake and eat it too. I'm so sorry that things have turned out the way they have for you. I do hope that this dose of reality will set her clock in motion and wake her up a bit more.
Take care of yourself and your little one.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
