Stop the Pity Party!

[Livin4ME]

Hey all.
It's been a while since I last posted. D was final April 9th. So far I'm surviving, but today has been extremely hard. Probably the worst day so far. I've moved back in with my parents and I have full custody of my kids. Still waiting on my c/s, the state keeps telling me if I haven't recieved it by the end of May to call them back. But this is just ridiculous!
My kids are having a real hard time with this, which is making it extremely difficult for me. D2 climbs into bed with me every night half way thru. And S4 climbs in early in the morning. I wake up to them fighting over the top of me. Not the best way to start the day seeing as I'm not a morning person anyways! lol
S4 has gotten completely out of control. Talking back. Pushing and hitting his sis. Constantly antagonizing her. She returns the favor when he's not. Whining and crying nonstop. Not doing anything we tell him to do. I just don't know what to do anymore.
Today, I think it's really gotten to me because on top of all this, I'm learning the hard way how hard it is to actually start over. I'm still using X's vehicle per the settlement. But I have to get a new vehicle soon. Well, today we had to take back a used car that we were trying to purchase. After having it for a week and haggling with banks trying to get financed, turned out it's not possible to do so and it's only for $10,000. Plus, I've finally caught the bug that's going around.
I was able to talk to my sis about some things, but it turns out that she thinks my life is a complete mess, my kids are crazy and I'm hopeless. And to top it all off, she thinks she's done better than me in all aspects of her life (which she hasn't!)
No job yet, I've applied all over and got one call back. But no one is hiring. (Huge surprise given the economy!)
As far as X is concerned, karma sucks! lol He's not doing good in his school for work. Failing in fact. To the point that they're sending him overseas for a year to reintroduce him to the Navy. He's still with his trash. She's now living in my old house while he is in school in another state.
And it's really funny, because I was doing pretty good. Got the kids registered for Pre-K and Preschool. I've been able to get together with some old friends. It just all snuck up on me over the last couple days.
I'm trying to find a church here. But not any real luck. I need to find some sort of support group also, but again, no real luck. My friends are all in different phases of their lives. One girlfriend is recently D, no kids and crazy work schedule. Another is happily married with a newborn and crazy work schedule. And the other is a single mom with a crazy work schedule. We get to talk every so often, but have a hard time actually getting together because of either their work or our kids.
I guess I just need a break. But I can't get it because X lives 5 hours away right now. And I live with my parents, so they can't take them. And my sis, well...she won't take them because they're crazy and she's too selfish.
I know this is a huge vent posting, but I just had to get it out!