You can be strong to protect yourself and your family without being evil, I think that is exactly what you are doing. You havent been dishonest about anything.
I guess I gave the wrong finger to the wrong man...
You can be strong to protect yourself and your family without being evil, I think that is exactly what you are doing. You havent been dishonest about anything.
Yeah my Bible verse for today was this:
Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. ~Matthew 7:12
You know... I haven't even exploded on W at all for her A. In fact... I just approached her offering forgiveness, asking to make our M stronger, and basically offering a semi-clean slate in terms of being willing to work past it.
I pretty much went textbook on everything, but unfortunately because of her mental issues, legal issues, etc. I haven't been in a position to do much.
There is a part of me though that just wants to let it out and to tell her exactly what I think of her and what she is doing - but ultimately that won't solve anything outside of making me feel better... and I suppose my burden is not saying anything... because I won't have to regret anything down the road.
She's just going to feel pretty stupid if/when she loses everything. I'm sure she isn't "happy" right now, because reality is coming in steady hard-hitting doses from my attorneys. Real life will intrude more when she loses health insurance, possibly custody, and when her surrogate father the judge isn't the nurturing bastion of tranquility and punishment towards me that she is expecting.
What a disappointing outcome for a promising relationship... at least how I remember it. We tend to remember the positive out of painful experiences... else women wouldn't sign up for childbirth more than once.
So... thank you for the words of support guys and gals... I imagine things will be looking up one way or another as time passes.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
D1 was doing good this morning. She was dancing to a tune some toy was playing and sucking on her pacifier. I had thought she had moved past that - but apparently she still likes to have one. I held her for a few minutes, but was in a rush this morning.
Moving closer to the 6 month period post D-day, so I'm moving on emotionally more and more, which is good for me. I think having a firm date set (July 13) for the end of my M has put me in the frame of mind to where I can let it go.
Now as reality begins to sink in further and further I'm anticipating W will possibly either make overtures back towards the M or just continue standing around in shock while the house of cards continues to fall. I'm pretty certain she needs help before I agree to work on the M with her, and I imagine I should go for the kill right now and try post-D piecing if that is an option.
I just believe that this is the end, and will be unless and until she receives whatever help she needs.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
D1 loaded up a diaper from front to back this morning... nice and stinky. She did stay still while I changed her. As soon as she saw me poke my head in the door she came walking to me. She seemed tired this morning, and wanted to snuggle with her pink blanket while I held her. I spoke with the daycare worker for a few minutes, have to travel out of town on business and won't be able to see D1 TH or FR so we were just chatting about that.
I held D1 for a bit, and when I sat her down and went to leave she started crying and reaching to me. I came back and gave her a hug. I went to hand her to the daycare worker and she leaned back towards me. The daycare worker said "D1 you better come to me." and I handed her over. She then started reaching out and crying when I left again.
W now lists herself as 'single' on Facebook and has an album titled 'family' where she lists herself, my boys, and our daughter.
Meanwhile we are staring down July 13 as the end - and I think she is living under the assumption that she can walk in and take not only D1 but my boys as well. Seems kind of arrogant and entitled to me. Especially when I'm the one holding the two smoking guns she left.
Her entire case imploded out of the gate whenever they found out that not only could I talk the talk, but I knew exactly what I was doing legally. I'm sure the "bully him with abuse accusations" works 99% of the time.
Not this time. There is going to be a reckoning.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
I saw and spoke to W on Wednesday... or rather spoke at W since she didn't acknowledge me. I looked at her from the side and she seemed a bit round in the belly...
I went out of town for business, and my mom saw W on Thursday and said it looked like she was wearing a girdle or some crap under her shirt.
Starting to piece together the sneaking suspicion that W is now pregnant by OM. I'm not sure completely what effect this has had on their relationship... but I am quite certain that it could be the reason why they are in the fetal position legally right now.
What a train wreck...
Anyway, I'll update after getting D1 tomorrow.
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
Pick up went fine this morning. W is getting quite large... all around. I would like to think it is stress eating... but something has to explain the virtual possum strategy they have going on legally. I didn't have my boys with me, so they played 20 questions with me, acting defensively, etc. and seemed agitated.
It probably has something to do with the fact that before I left town Wednesday I actually filed a response to their (length) request for production of documents and interrogatories - which now gives me the legal right to force W to do the same. So now I get to put her under oath in a week or two... assuming she shows. If she doesn't response to our requests - we'll file a contempt motion. So...
* Possible pregnancy by OM * On video (Adultery fault ground) * Journal (Mental history/psych eval)
And < 2 months until trial... and she has absolutely no case built... and she's the Plaintiff.
I suppose it is too much to ask for her to just be honest with me and apologize? Will she be denying the affair in the delivery room?
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
