Hi Sandi. Thank you so much for your advice, it really helps to get another perspective. I am definately moving to our hometown..your advice as well as that of many others has made that decision my only choice, along with what you were saying about really needing to move on for myself. He is not happy about it, he says I can do what I want but that he wants to be closer to the kids and doesn't want me "taking them away". It is hard because I have to deal with him about all of the financial aspects and I feel like if he was ever going to change his mind that he wouldn't let me go thru with it and if he does it is like a nail in the coffin of ever hoping for a reconciliation. I can't help but think that in my heart I know we are not over. I am sure everyone thinks that way...but everyone in our lives is so shocked and upset...everyone says how much pride he has in me and the girls and that he talks about it all the time. We had so many plans for the future...we were about to look at buying a house right before all of this started!! Anyway...I have read DR and am going to look more into the "going dark". Do you have any recommendations on how to do that when I still need to talk to him re: finances and renting a new place. The military pays for our housing....and he says he will cooperate and give me what I want... which makes me freak out and scared that he will never want me back. Ahhh...this is so confusing. I just want my husband back!! That being said, I also want him to go on this journey...to figure himself out and I can do the same, ideally we will both do that and be stronger for it together in the future. I am so comforted on this site...it helps so much to know that I am not alone and i wish everyone the best...I wish i could help more people and maybe someday I will...when my life isn't in such turmoil. You were so right about the emotional rollercoaster..it makes me want to puke all day everyday! Thanks again for your imformative and comforting posts!!!
