I don't think I have exactly taken up for your wife in any of this......only tried to explain how things are from a WAW's POV and just a mother's POV. Maybe you are just as sincere as you can be in saying that you did not think about the Mother's Day thing, but to a woman it is hard to imagaine anybody forgetting that it's "Mother's Day" (for crying out loud) and that she would naturally want to see her children on that special day. Was there NOTHING that caused you to remember that?
Anyway, it is past but I hope you will learn from this b/c holidays are very important to most people. She said you were scheduled to have them on Father's Day, so I bet you would be upset if she had them and would not see to it that they were with you for part of that day. See how it would feel? So, my advice would be that as with most split couples.....you come to a compromise about holidays and who they will spend what holidays with. Most parents have to swasp around from year to year the really big days like Christmas, etc. That is just part of all the mess of being a couple that has split up.
I still say not to cave to her every whim, but please use some forethought about such things. Had it not occurred to you that the children were scheduled to be with you every holiday? Birthdays and some other occassions can be celebrated on alternate days, but some holidays can't.
Hope you can work out a better situation and realize that if this S lasts for any length of time, there has to be a lot of give and take where "special days" are concerned. The more couples are not keenly aware of the other parent's feelings about such days.....the deeper they dig their own hole.
So, hope the next time works a lot better.
Take care, Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
