Hi Judy - I've read through your thread and, although my H is having an affair, there is a similarity to our situations. The A is most likely just a symptom of what lies at the heart of our issues. My H said many of the same things as yours. He moved out and I was faced with looking at my part in the things that went wrong in our relationship. Everyone thinks that I'm incredibly strong and dignified, and that I've handled this situation with a lot of grace, but inside I feel like I'm dying. Like you, I'm trying to keep busy, get involved, reassess, and learn. When you wrote that you didn't like the person that you had become, I could relate to that. I guess I am stronger than some might be, but I don't feel it inside. On the other hand, you appear to have a level of acceptance that I admire. And also a great deal of self-respect. I applaud you for that.
I am wondering if you think that your H's actions have anything to do with a MLC? My H and I are in our early 50s and I strongly suspect that my H is going through a major MLC. That;s not to say that there aren't things that I need to work on, but it explains a lot to me.
I will follow your posts and your growth as you wind your way through these dark days. By the way - we don't have kids either, but 4 cats and a big wonderful, old dog!
