Setting Boundaries for MLC Alien H

[In Limbo]

Grace,

How I'm holding up depends on the moment. Got to have lunch today with one of my longest friends (we met when I was about 6!) and that was great. Didn't plan on sharing what was going on, but ended up doing so. Turns out she has been being pursued by a man at work and has the beginnings of an EA going on. She's married to a wonderful man and I think our conversation helped give her a wakeup call about that slippery slope. It also helped me feel a little more like me again, being with someone who's known me so long, since way before H and loves me no matter what.

I know telling him about rewriting history was wasted breath, but I couldn't hold it in. Discipline is not my strong suit. Of all things I could have not held in, that's probably the least devastating one. I could have lashed out about OW but I didn't.

H is at dance class, but will be home soon. I will not initiate any R talk and will do my best to DB if he does. I won't bring up him leaving again, but I think it's really just come to a head for him and the best thing may be for him to go out on his own and see what happens. It kills me, but now that he's moved to being angry (this is new) at me for changing now and never before, I don't know if we can continue this roller coaster of separation weekdays and together weekends. In time he'll see my changes are for real. Will it be enough? Will it be too late? Will I still be standing? Only God knows.