Speaking as a woman doesn't make you a spokesperson for all women.
Speaking as a man doesn't make you a spokesperson for ANY women, so you might wanna lose the 'tude.
Originally Posted By: Puppy Dog Tails
I know the potential is THERE, but I only see it to the degree that my wife is sincere about her issues and wants to join me in working at this thing. That's why I was hopeful this past weekend -- she seemed sincere. Her pulling away since shows me that she isn't, and therefore I end up NOT hopeful -- at all -- and therefore I would never risk the kind of pain and loneliness and hurt you describe in such a statement.
It's a vicious circle.
While I do SO understand where you're coming from considering where you've been ... real life doesn't work that way. A person doesn't commit or recommit to a path and then continue straight up the mountain with no detours or sprained ankles. I think it's a great mistake to invalidate her sincerity of last weekend based on her current pullback. People wax and wane; it's what they do. Especially if they're trying to undo some long-snarled emotional knots/habits.
If you are so injured and drained of patience by her past responses, the affair, etc that every setback causes you to lose hope and faith in her as a person or at least in her intentions toward you ... I understand. Many people wouldn't have held on as long as you have. But still .... if that's what you find when you look in your heart, I think you have to let her go, because as a flawed human she *cannot* win if those are the rules of the game.
"Show me a completely smooth operation and I'll show you someone who's covering mistakes. Real boats rock." -- Frank Herbert
