Puppy, your sitch is confusing to me. On the one hand, I know you love her so much and every time there is a chance at a full reconciliation you are elated. On the other hand, you seem to be so full of contempt for her and truly feel she is an entitled beast.
So I just don't get it sometimes. If she is truly NPD and a beast, why do you even want her?
And if she is not really those things and she is actually just a bit messed up, then why do you not have more compassion for her?
I know what hoosier said is true...and that we all need to validate ourselves...but that isn't really what I was getting at. I was getting at the fact that she may have real, legitimate needs which you are not helping her receive. I know you are familiar with MBuilders...have you also read their EN questionaire and other articles and questionaires? I am just trying to point out that she is clearly acting like a woman who "needs something". Now, as I said in the first paragraph...sometimes you act like what she needs might just be something legitmate, and other times you act like she is simply a narcissist.
I know you know a bit of my story...so you know that I also want and need constant attention from my fiance...and no matter how anyone else may feel that this is a need for validation, it isn't. For me, it is a sexual need and is part of my sexual fulfillment. And granted...I give him constant assurance even if he doesn't need it, I chase him, I make him feel loved and wanted and sexually fulfilled, I make sure he knows he has my attention and I am constantly attracted to him...so it goes both ways. Both of us are very confident people, too. I don't need his validation to make me feel better as a person. I need it in order to be turned on all the time for him. Its different.
I realize too, that you have been needing and wanting compliments and validation from HER and she has failed you in this way, too. So what I fear is happening here is that you are both in a stale mate...I won't do it because he/she is failing me at it.
