Thanks for your responses. What do I want? Well, I want my husband and my marriage back. But I do know that he's been cake eating and it bothers me. On the other hand, I don't know if seeing him on the anniversary will benefit our relationship or not. It's impossible to know what is going on in his head right now. I know that he and the OW hit a rough patch, but I think they've ironed it out. The reality is that they barely know one another and he is running. Sober for 8 years and active in AA, but my therapist sees this as a type of relapse.
Anyway, I'm so confused. Just don't know how to act anymore. I'm afraid to go dark (or at least dim) but that's what might be needed now.
