Is my sitch WAS or MLC?

[LolaL]

I know how you feel. I lost my beloved brother last month, and when I called for H's comfort, all he could offer was a quick pat on the back and throw a little cash my way. What I wanted was his shoulder, his arms around me, just for a moment to comfort so I didn't feel so lost and alone.

But he couldn't give it. After that I didn't hear from him for a month. His reason? He said what could he do about it? He was sorry I lost my brother, but there was nothing he could do.

This behavior is such a slap in the face. I don't know if they really are aware of how much they are hurting, or if they just want someone to feel as miserable as they do. It seems so unfair because we are the ones who do love them, and they are throwing that away.

And yet, here we are, trying to make sense of all of this. I am not sure it works. I don't know if we ever will. We just know that these are not the people we married, and are left to wonder if that will change. For the rare few, it does. The rest of us are left to pick up the pieces of our lives.

Remember, you cannot control anything he does. It is a helpless feeling to watch someone you love so much slip away. But the only thing you can do is control your own actions, and handle everything you do with dignity and grace. In the long run, you can look back and remember that you were the strong one when he was falling apart. Regardless of how it turns out, you will be able to know that you held your head high, and acted with love and understanding. It will be good for you.