Divorce looming #13

[K4D]

I know. I think I just got frusturated tonite. I can say this. I am not looking to please anyone anymore. The only reason I didn't take the cheaper apartment was I didn't want to end up in a court battle for half custody of my kids and end up losing and having to pay W. I will just pay the extra expense for the apartment which will be far cheaper. I was so happy the girls loved it. It should make a big difference in their demeanor. I had worried that the other one in the good school district would make them feel boxed in because it was smaller.

So 7 and a half months at this place. Gives me more time to figure things out and see what is going to happen with my job.

I am looking at getting them a maine coon cat for a pet. I just don't want to mess with a dog in an apartment. Those cats are supposed to be as close to comperable to a dog as there is. They are actually pretty neat cats. They are good companions.

It will be interesting living on my own. Maybe the sanity will return. I can't keep living in this house being treated like this anyways.

I sent W a text message tonite saying you don't always have to be a nasty person about everything. You used to be a sweet kind person.

I didn't get a response. But when she got home, she was nice tonite or at least cordial. Maybe she thought about that. Who knows. But I haven't been yelled at for the rest of the night.

Apparently her mom called her to gripe about me calling to need a key to get into the house. I told W I think her mom is kind of going over the top. W tells me that I made her mad and I can't decide her feelings towards me. I said I am not trying to decide her feelings towards me. I said but I am being unfairly treated because I am not bloodline. W agreed.

Thats the thing with this family. If you are not bloodline and you are not well off, they have no problem hanging you out to dry if you make a mistake. I have seen it for years towards me, and the others that married into the family.

I was raised differently. I was raised that when you marry into the family, you are family. Period. End of story. But that isn't how W's family operates.

So yes, I have to be the example to my kids for so many reasons even though I get chewed up and spit out by this family.

Strangely, I am looking forward to my new place now. Its bigger and open and a bit more money. But its going to be great. I won't have to deal with garbage anymore. I just have to plan my future is all now. I can do that. My job is starting to pick up. I am going to meetup groups. I am meeting with one person I met Monday to discuss a business idea. That would be great to start on the side. It may not amount to anything either. But I am trying to see what I can do on the side of my job to make extra money.

If I want to go into either bathroom, I can. HA! I don't quite have that permission here right now. I asked W if I could shower in her bathroom this morning because D11 was using the other one and W said no. We guess what, now I can shower in which ever bathroom I feel like. HA!

I am going to invite some people over for a poker party to. HA! By the way Jag, do you play poker?

I do $5 buy in and usually cut that off about 10:30 at night to finish up the tournament. I haven't had a poker party in forever. This will be great. W loves to play also, she has just refused to have one anymore this past year because she wants nothing to do with me and other people at the same time.

W says she may not give me the long table. Sounds like a dispute in the making. It feels kind of good to start taking some stands for myself.

Negotiations my dear watson.

Kevin