I wish I had found your thread sooner, but alas, tonight is the first time I've seen it. I actually read the first and last pages. On your first page, you asked if there is anyone who is in a similar sitch as you. I, am 56 years old, so I consider myself pretty similar to you, with all the financial difficulties etc.
So, some of our sitch is very similar, however, my H has not filed for divorce. I, was very confused myself last year at this time, and really just a total basket case. But throughout the year, I would ask for help and people seemed to think I was their punching bag. Perhaps they didn't know it, but many times I was more hurt by certain posters than helped, and often walked away from my computer completely distraught. As early as a week ago, it happened again. I've been insulted and verbally abused here. So, I don't post too much anymore. I guess my philosophy of life is different than most.
Now that it's been a year, I can look back and see that, although, my H NEVER calls me, and RARELY comes home or passes our house, I wonder if he's been lying to me all along. I cannot read him like you can read your H. He says one thing and really does something else. My feelings have NEVER been on his respect list, though now I really don't expect it anymore. My H has been much meaner than most.
The last time he spoke to me, he said he never reaches out to me, and to be true, he really does not. I can see that this time away from home has taken its toll on him. And, he has sent his marriage settlement agreement to me -- through his attorney -- a month and a half ago, but he still has not filed for divorce.
I have never had the great help and respect of a good advisor on these boards as you have, with snodderly. I was all over the place when I was first going through this. So, some of it was probably my fault. I didn't know any better, and now it doesn't matter. I've read some of snodderly's stuff, and she/he is very good. I think you can't get a better friend/advisor than that.
I hope some of what I said here soothes you. To be true, I feel your pain. I hope this message finds you well.
