Thank you PearlHarbr, I have been waiting for a time to financially independent for a long time. I am 35 and finally have that opportunity. In the divorce papers he has given me 95% or our belongings and wants to give me money, etc, etc...
I think he is using $ and "supporting" me as a means to ease his conscience about what he is doing. It is something he does for his family. He supports 3 households, including us.
I want emotional intimacy........and I think he uses money as a way of maintaining an emotional distance. He feels ok to walk away emotionally as long as he is financially stepping up and providing. Its how he deals. I could be wrong.....but, I feel enough of an instict about it to not take anything from him right now.
This way he can't say "he is working hard to support me and doesn't have time to think about anything bc he is working and trying to support us".
Well, nothing to say for today. I was not successful at having a day without despair. Sigh. I am dissappointed in myself. I talked to friends thinking they would give me some hope, but instead I think most of my friends have started to accept this as a done deal or at best, 90% chance of failure/ 10% recovery. So, that is that. sigh.
