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John--

Your wife is crazy and my husband is oblivious. I can get over my aversion for the AF uniforms. What do you say we get married and runaway to Ramstadt without them??? ;\) (ATTENTION Mods THIS IS A JOKE!)

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW


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Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through
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I Corinthians 13:7



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SMW: That proposal is about the sanest suggestion I've ever read on this thread. Too cute. Actually, I would feel such joy to see you two nice people find some sense in all this nonsense.

John, John, John...

Lucky

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LOL Lucky! I needed some humor. we literally caught D17 cutting her last class today. My mom went to pick her up to--get this-- go to meet her new counselor! Then, when I texted her to ask where she was, she lied and said she was in class, just came back from the bathroom. TWIT! Now, she is facing at minimum a 5 day in school suspension, possible expulsion.

So much fun!

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW


M40/H36
T16/M14
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Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through
every circumstance.
I Corinthians 13:7



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Ugh, I'm going to be 40 this month and I feel like a little kid, really. I understand her reservations about not wanting to put up w/ some stuff but why would she leave her child. It seems like everytime we get close to resolving this, something happens to push it even further away from ever happening. I think Gucci said it--something about a slow death. It seems no matter what I do or what I say there's something else that gives her a reason to not try and work this out. Now, instead of just feeling like a failure as a husband, she's made me feel like there's no future for me after the military? I'm sure I'll be able to get a contract job or a GS job so I don't know why she would say this. I know she probably really did have an affair although she said today that she only said this so I would let her go and that the real problem has been me all along. She told me something that I remember her saying a long time ago. It was that if I didn't give her the affection she needed I was going to grow old alone. That dug into me hard today, really hard. What can I do to please this woman? Why has she determined in her mind that I'm such a loser? She even said it today that she used to worship the ground I walked on. How did I lose that? I don't know. Hell, while I'm asking all these stupid questions, what's the freaking meaning of life? Anyone?


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Oh boy... EXPULSION? That's pretty harsh for cutting one class, isn't it?

My son is only 17 MONTHS old. I really am terrified of the teenage years, because I'm a control freak who knows that I can't tolerate much nonsense, mayhem, foolishness, and what-not. I guess God put him here to wear me in and knock me down a bit. We'll both learn from each other, I suppose. For now, it's just keeping him from running into the street or climbing onto high ledges... which can be MADDENING as he is a persistent little guy.

Sorry, John... SMW and I don't get to talk much!

Lucky

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Originally Posted By: AFWAW


So, she still can't get past all the stuff from over the years and unless she can I don't see much hope of moving forward with her.


And unfortunately, she WON'T be able to get past all that stuff as long as she is in contact with other men. She either doesn't understand that, or she doesn't care, but it's emotionally and even physiologically true.

Ball's in your court, I'm afraid.

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Originally Posted By: LuckyGirl
Oh boy... EXPULSION? That's pretty harsh for cutting one class, isn't it?

My son is only 17 MONTHS old. I really am terrified of the teenage years, because I'm a control freak who knows that I can't tolerate much nonsense, mayhem, foolishness, and what-not. I guess God put him here to wear me in and knock me down a bit. We'll both learn from each other, I suppose. For now, it's just keeping him from running into the street or climbing onto high ledges... which can be MADDENING as he is a persistent little guy.

Sorry, John... SMW and I don't get to talk much!

Lucky


Lucky--

It will be the fifth time she has been caught this year cutting. So nope, expulsion is not harsh.

John--

Not interested in Ramstadt, huh? Oh well, I will stick to Navy guys.

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW


M40/H36
T16/M14
4K
B2/08
S4/08
current

Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through
every circumstance.
I Corinthians 13:7



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Quote:
Ball's in your court, I'm afraid


I hate that freaking ball. I really wish I could smash it down her throat at this point. How does this woman have the ability to make me feel so low?

She had to have had an affair. She told me, her parents, and our daughter that she had OM. Why exactly would she lie about that now? I know, because she doesn't want to get into trouble. Man, this is a big fat mess!


M-41
ex-W-40
Together--17 years
SS-20
D-14
Bomb--2 Feb 09
WAW--6 Feb 09
Officially divorced on 2 Jun 2010!!!
ex-W has a boyfriend 8 Jun 2010!!!
Off we go into the wild blue yonder!!!!
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John,

We can't have your W lying and making up stories AND you living in denial. Somebody's gotta steer the ship here. I vote for you.

You are filled with self doubt. Certainly, you had your part in the marriage. Everybody does. Nobody, not even someone in the best marriage, can say that they don't have something they need to be better at. Nothing anyone does justifies adultery. Only someone who is afraid that there will be no change or has given up without trying walks away without facing their loved one to give him a chance.

Sounds like you need to work on intimacy and connection. This is not unusual at all... If you have the time and the mental space, order a copy of "Passionate Marriage" by Schnarch. I am sure that some of the material in that book will resonate. If you're not ready to read it now, order it for later when you're feeling ready to think about a future relationship.

You are such a good man. Looking at yourself and your part in this particular situation takes greatness. It would be easy for anyone to pin everything on your W, given the facts we have here.

Lay low and clear your head. She is filling it with false information that will crush you.

Lucky

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Originally Posted By: AFWAW
Hell, while I'm asking all these stupid questions, what's the freaking meaning of life? Anyone?


Look at your beautiful little girl. Look in her eyes and know that no matter what, she loves you. It may not be the meaning of life, but it is a damn good reason to keep going on and making it the best it can be.

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW


M40/H36
T16/M14
4K
B2/08
S4/08
current

Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through
every circumstance.
I Corinthians 13:7



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